We sure do. And theuncertainty beat me to the explanation. Basically, unless you have evidence of a crime, the children will spend time with both parents.
Yup, some codependents have control issues. I've actually removed myself from a friendship with a fellow Al-Anon person for this reason -- because she was always telling me what to do and how to do it, and became irate and agitated if I didn't. Things like "you really should take your car to this mechanic" and "you really need to iron your shirts better, I can teach you how to do it." Oy.
I find the same thing in myself -- when I ride in a car with someone, I have to bite my tongue not to tell them which lane to get in, even if they've lived and driven here as long as I have...
How to interact with a codie? Set your boundaries and protect yourself. It's OK to say "I don't want to discuss that." It's OK to say no. It's OK to say "you do things your way, I do things my way. Would you pass the bean dip, please?" (that is -- state the fact, change the subject).