Gracey

I am always posting when things are going bad it seems..........

These last 11 days have been going very good for me......my AH for the most part has been very quiet these last 11 days..telling me how much he loves me and is being very apologetic........he is sober for 150 days tomorrow......I told him how proud of him I was..........

We havent seen are counselor in three weeks due to my daughter having drivers training......we are going back tonight..We left are a really raw subject last time we were their regarding my oldest child.....My husband was complaing how she doesnt do anything......around the house unless asked......if I ask her then she does it no problem........sometimes half ass, sometimes not........Sometimes I have to ask her more then once...........sometimes I dont.......sometimes I have to remind her.........and sometimes I dont...........Sometimes when I ask her, if she accomplished the task I asked her to do.......(it maybe as simple as switching the washer and dryer around) she says she forgets........I know my daughter doesnt like doing chores in the house........

My thing is it doesnt bother me...........I have had this theory as long as she is doing well in school.......that is her full time job......I dont bring work home with me........she does.........she has homework to do........and studying for a test........I dont...she is a sophmore with enough pressure on her already...........am I being way to easy........

My AH biggest complaint is my daughter not doing anything around the house...I have told him to not focus on her to focus on what he is doing........It is driving me crazy.......Is this another way he is trying to pull me in..........to this chaos......he never says anything to her......he is always telling me to tell her to do this.......or ask her to not do that......I told him yesterday.....I am sick of you telling me to tell her to do something......I told him to tell her........he says if I tell her you wont like what I say or how I tell her........

He said he wants a chore list.........I have created one before and his name was included on the list..........everyone was doing what they were suppose to do at first but him..........for some reason he doesnt remember that list I attempted......because he is always telling me if you would just listen to me about that chore list......everything would be fine.......ergggggggggg......alot of the time the list wouldnt get followed by anyone but me.........things come up.......big test......unexpected homework..........a friend coming over.....or her going there........

I really think this is one of his obsessions.............he knows that he can push my buttons when it comes to her.........he gets in his mood saying it is not her fault it is mine because I dont make her do anything, I didnt teach her anything......her straight A's is what i care about...I dont care if she didnt get all straight A's as long as she was doing the best she can.....and she does and to me school is number one......that is her life and her future...............Everyone else is happy but him.........is this a target........It is almost harder for me to ask my kids to do something then it is to do it myself......It is more work and more frustration for me.............does that make sense to anyone..........

If anyone were to ever drop over my house or say they will be there in 20 minutes........that is all I would need to make it presentable.......I would shut my kids doors (sometimes).........nobody ever sees my oldest daughters room unless it is her friends and if she want to be embarrased then let her.........but she tends to pick it up if she knows a friend is coming over....tooooo