Oh honey, it's notjust a dog, it's all about power and control.
And you're not to tainted, I told myself that same thing for so many years, how can anyone love me I have been verbally, physically, and sexually abused. I don't deserve anyones love.
It's all crap, we put up these walls to protect ourselves from hurt, and pain, and suffering.
I love you, why, because you are a human being, and you deserve love.
You have caused no harm, you are the victim of an abuser, it hurts me to know that my mother will always love booze more than me, but I soldier on, I am the baby duck, I just keep on waddling and quacking.
You can do this, if you learn to love yourself, then others cannot help but love you.
Please don't lose faith, there is someone out there that wants to love you, and treat you like the princess that you are, god will bring that person to you once all the debris in your life is cleared away..
Please go look at the ACOA forum, at the end of december I posted a set of self-esteem exercises my therapist gave me, they are positive affirmations, they seem a little corny, but if you do them often they really help.
Anytime you are feeling down, you just let me know, I have a big bear hug for you, all you have to do is picture my arms around you holding you tight.
You can send me a private message and I will give you my facebook and email if you would like them.
Aw hell i'm rambling, but i'm worried about you.
You see this is my payback, I almost died a few years ago in a car accident, nearly bled out, I said a prayer and an angel stopped the bleeding, no kidding, the artery in my arm was cut, I was spraying blood, I was almost gone, the bleeing just stopped.
I know god has a plan for me, I don't know for sure what it is, but I think it is for me to be there when others need me.
So, I will be there for you, you have a shoulder to lean on, a hand to hold, an ear to bend, just don't give up hope.
May god bless you and keep you well,
Your friend,
Bill