Well, my sex life with my aexh wasn't great. His other addiction was porn, which was the basis of our bedroom problems. Ya know how puzzling it is when As choose drinking over a collection of more valuable things... like their families, jobs, and lives generally... well, pornography addicts choose pictures over the real thing, and I don't get that either. And I wouldn't have been willing to live the rest of my life with it, no matter how much I loved him.
My only post divorce boyfriend preferred me, and what a fabulous experience that was. I have since then practiced a great deal of celibacy, and the best I can say is that it leaves me with so much creative energy that I can now practice playing music for hours a day. But it's like having some high quality ice cream when you're really craving a pizza... one thing can only be substituted for another for so long (except, apparently, to porn addicts, see paragraph A).
I admit I find myself terribly physically attracted to someone whom I believe to be a problem drinker, though I don't expect anything to result from it. It's less alcoholism, I think, than the fact that I like reserved men... nothing turns me off faster than a guy who dumps his emotions all over me (clinginess: AAAAARRRGHH!). But reserve can be a token of self discipline-- or it can result from emotional unavailability, and it's hard to tell until you're involved. It's worrisome that I know other men that I think are attractive, but the one I really want is the one who drinks too much. Yeah, he can keep alcohol around his house and not consume it, but still, hmm. If I go there and I get hurt, it's my fault, not his.
So I am not going to get drawn into physical entanglements, or any other kind, one hopes, with the charming problem drinker. But I, um, imagine it. A lot.