A day after she got out, I got a text from her and her boyfriend asking if they could come by to get some clothing and also make some food.
I now wish I had just put the stuff out in the driveway or put it all in a storage unit, because although I did maintain my boundaries in regards to letting her in the house, there was drama when she came to get things.
It started out OK, but soon degenerated into a full blown scene. She didn't speak a word to me, but started pawing through her things, throwing things into a suitcase, and first saying and then yelling about how I didn't care and that she was ****ing homeless and needed help and I wouldn't help her. Her boyfriend, who told me that he had talked to her on the way over and that they'd planned to be completely civil and thank me for letting them come, understanding why she couldn't live here, started in on me too, about how I needed to take responsibility for her emotional problems and why was it my way or the highway, that maybe she needed a place to live first and get psychological help so she could kick this stuff, blah blah blah.
He started to become verbally abusive and very agitated and I asked, then told him that they would have to leave. She was crouched on the floor sobbing hysterically between screaming at me that I promised her she wouldn't be homeless and that I didn't care and that I was just a bitch and that she needed help and I wouldn't help her get it.
I shouldn't have engaged in it at all, but couldn't go back in the house while they were there because I figured my car would be damaged or other things taken. I asked her if she had spent the day calling the counseling center or trying to find help, and her BF jumped all over me about she hasn't even been out of jail for a whole day, man and she needed sleep and a day to get herself together. I pointed out that the first thing she wanted to do was use, not get help. I pointed out that there are consequences for the things she's done, and not being able to live here is one of them.
Anyway, it's a big mess and I haven't heard from here since. That was a few days ago.
How can you provide unconditional love and support when you don't know where they are or how to get in touch with them? Should I just walk away from this altogether until she contacts me again or should I sent messages that I care about what happens to her?
No matter what I say, it gets spun around and pointed back at me, and it just makes everything worse :'(