First of all, thank you so much for all of your replies. Each one read and re-read and very valuable to me. I can't tell you how much your support helps.
Unfortunately, daughter herself has made things easier
She called about an hour ago and said she'd been released from jail. Wanted to know if I might possibly pick her up from jail (about an hour away) if it was a decent hour. I told her that we needed to talk and she said, yeah, I know, you made it crystal clear that I couldn't live there after lying to me and telling me I'd never be homeless and all that crap and oh, yeah, we didn't even talk for years before this because you kicked me out already once and did all kinds of heinous crap to me. So, like **** it.
Then she asked me to 3way with her friend and I suppose I shouldn't have but I did. It was very enlightening. She told him "Mom is psycho" and that that I wouldn't come get her. He said he
thought he could but needed gas money and told her that her BF was in the car with him and wanted to talk to her. At first she didn't want to talk to her BF, but he got on the phone with her and within 20 seconds she was asking him how much money he had. When he replied, like 20 bucks for gas and a pack of cigarettes, she jumped all over him because she wanted him to have saved x amount of money for her when she got out and wanted him to bring her drugs. He told her to go F herself because all she cares about is him getting her drugs and not that she hasn't seen him for 2 months. I overheard him tell her that he hasn't done anything in a few days and won't have any more money til Friday and can't she hang on til then and just look forward to seeing him. I got on the phone then and said it was so sad that she has chosen drugs over everything else and that she's on her own and best of luck. The time ran out and then she called back but I didn't answer the phone. So she's getting out tonight.