A long time ago someone paralleled my son's addiction as being Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
The Jekyll side was pleasant, personal able quiet and trusting. The Hyde side was simply
plain evil. They suggested that I see and not go into denial that each side has a personality and learn to deal with each as you are confronted.
The hard part was accepting the Hyde side since as mothers we inevitably see the good side and cannot accept the evil side.
After awhile it was obvious to me which side I was seeing.
I had to become very vigilant as it was a struggle and it is definitely not a position that made me comfortable to separate the two people in the same body.
I see drugs of any sort this way now with some others that are using.
What once was is no longer.
My heart feels for your sadness to have to make choices that are so unnatural for a parent.
You aren't dealing with your loved one at times, sometimes we are dancing with a presents that scares us and baffles us.
Know that your decisions are wise. It is a protection that we all have to make sooner than later.
Support can come when we see the sparkle that has been lost and then we can become moms and dads again..until then we have to save ourselves.
Try to have a good day, I know it is difficult.
My best to you.
lauren