Ending A Relationship With An Addict, But Still Wanting To Help Them
Ending a long term relationship is never easy for anyone. After finding out my boyfriend had relapsed I didn't know what to think or feel. He came over to my place to talk about everything but it was him trying to justify his relapsing. When I asked him if he wants to be sober and healthy, he never gave me a flat out yes or no. He kept talking in circles about the things he wanted and how he wants to be sober (non of which made any sense nor had to do with him being sober) and it became aggravating.
When I woke up today I wasn't sure on how to go about my day. He called me and didn't have anything new to say. I then asked him again if he wanted to be sober and live healthy, again not getting a flat out yes or no. It finally clicked that he'll never want to be sober and I have to start taking care of myself instead of him for a change. I can't be with someone that can't take care of them self. Not to mention he didn't have much of a reaction to me ending the relationship.
Although I've been trying to forget about ending my 4 1/2 year relationship by sleeping for most of the day, I'm feeling ok. As sad as I am about the relationship being over and him making it clear that he's not ready to be sober, I'm just wondering where to go from here? A part of me wants to be there for him but the other part thinks that having no contact will help him. What am I supposed to do? How do I move on worrying about him and wondering if there is anything I can or supposed to do?
I'm new here and so far I've appreciated reading other stories and receiving advice. Any input is always appreciated.