I will accept him drinking, but my line is drinking to excess every night, and demonstrating to the kids that as soon as you finish work, or anytime you are upset, beer is the answer. I hate days when he finished work early (he is self employed) and he has already had 4 beers by the time the kids get home from school (and the day is still young). I hate that if something happened to me he could never drive me to the hospital because he is always over the limit. I hate that I can't trust him to be the designated driver anywhere we go because he'll have one beer, but he can't stop so he'll have 4 and then drive me and the kids home
I hate that those weeks when we are broke and I am struggling to feed the kids he limits himself to a cheaper slab of beer. We can't afford beer at all on weeks like that! I hate that he will spend $150 a week on beer when I worry over every cent. I hate that I tell him alcohol is an issue for out marriage and his answer is "but it's not against the law". That's not the freaking point!
If he could drink like a normal person I wouldn't care. I don't even care if he gets drunk occasionally and spend the entire weekend suffering with a hangover. I don't care if he wants a few beers. But I hate that beer is more important than everything else. I know I need to go to al anon. I might be able to go next week.