StarCat,
I'm so sorry...for the whole thing.
One of the things I see from your posts, however, is how far you have come in your recovery process! Wow. I'm so impressed with how you've set boundaries with XABF's family, as well as you did with him. I'm thinking about how, if we focus on our own paths, we give others a chance to focus on theirs.
What a gift that your XABF died sober. What a tremendous gift. Finally, perhaps, he had a chance to live at the end. And how strong and empowered you sound.
As sorry as I am, and despite how much I hate this disease, I hear success and triumph in your story. Thank you for sharing it.
Hugs, hugs...
posie