Originally Posted by
frances2011 
Just noticed this thread. I appreciate all the shares. Thank you for this conversation.
EveningRose's share makes my heart squeeze because this is how I feel. It's a real taboo in my family to think like this. In my family, the dysfunction required that I didn't get my needs met... I got the "you are holding a grudge and you will regret it" speech from my step-mom a few months ago.
I haven't officially gone No Contact™ with my extended family -- but I sure have gone Next To No Contact!
In this family dynamic, there's no need to say, "I am going No Contact -- henceforth, I will not see any of you." You can just let go of the rope. Don't answer the phone -- or take a long time to call back, and make sure you do it when there isn't much time to talk.
My favorite tactic, with my sister, is that I tend not to answer if I'm at home, but if I'm in the middle of a bowling tournament or something and the phone rings and it's her, I answer, and just talk for a minute or two and then say, "Whoops -- gotta go, it's my turn!" That takes care of my "obligation" to talk to her, but with a minimum of time-wasting!
T