Need help with teenager who is mad at me
Since the incident with the DUI last week, my son has seen his father on one occasion during the week when he went out to eat with his grandmother and his father was with her as he father cannot drive. His father asked to have him this weekend and when I asked my lawyer about this he suggested I let him see his son during the day for a set period of time. So AH and I decided on Sunday, today from 12-5, I would drive son over to father's house and pick him up. When I told son about the visitation, he got angry because he wants to spend the night too and have dad take him to school. I am not sure if dad has privileges to drive to work yet or not. Son loves his dad and thinks he is cool. Son asked a few minutes ago why I am being so mean. I explained to him that I am not the one who drove drunk with son's best friend in the truck and that this is what he and his father and I decided for the visitation. I told him it is not my intention to keep him from his father, but to protect him and keep him safe. I also went on to list the charges his father have against him: weaving, no seatbelt, failure to yield when turning left, DUI of .08-1.7, Driving under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs or a combination of both. Son yelled and said he knew all of this and didn't want to talk to me anymore. I told him he didn't have to talk but I wanted him to listen. I didn't talk much more, but in the end said I respected him too much to argue with him. He got weepy throughout this. Why doesn't he get mad at his father? Am I really being too stern? I know intellectually that he feels safer getting emotional with me and getting mad at me that I will not leave him, but emotionally it hurts really bad. Please help, I won't see my counselor until the 22nd, but plan to try to get in this week. Went to Al-Anon meeting yesterday. Thanks