Sarah--For some people, it can take quiet a while before the obsession to use drugs has been lifted. Hopefully, you have found NA in your area and have started to take some measures and steps towards freedom. In our text under the fifth tradition, our message is that "an addict, ANY addict, can stop using drugs, LOOSE THE DESIRE TO USE, and find a new way to live. The message is hope, and the promise of freedom". This to shall pass. When I get really weak, I have to rely on others to help me do what I can't do myself. Just hang in there and things will come to pass eventually.
Mike