dark thoughts
I married my AH because he was the most erudite, kind, and interesting person I've ever met.
I talked with him today and found that he's doing much worse. Shouldn't have seen him. His ex-partner (before me) is sending him money to live on, I think his brother too. He basically sits in his own filth all day watching porn. He drinks constantly but is careful to drink beer and wine so he doesn't get too sick. ('Cause that would be gross, I guess.)
Most of the time he sits in his study, but each night he goes down to the local pub for some beer, I guess to get a change of scenery. It's incredible that he can walk that far. And isn't that great--each and every night the pub is serving unlimited beer to a 62-year-old man who smells like a toilet and who can barely stand upright. The owner is probably sending all his kids to college off my husband's tab.
When I saw him today, he whined something about being "ashamed" and I laughed, then got myself away from him quickly, because what was on the tip of my tongue to say was: "If you had any concept of shame, you'd have killed yourself long ago."
I don't know what my point is here. My point is that there's no point. He wants to live as a swine and the world is happy to support him in it.