Yeah, that sounds familiar. I haven't read any of your other posts, but are you using any kind of support, like AA, when you try to quit? I know personally I was never able to quit and stay stopped for any length of time on my own -- my short memory of how bad it can get kicks in and I was usually a little surprised every time I got the same (or worse) results by doing the same thing over and over again. It's bizarre. I'm a relatively bright individual otherwise, but when it comes to this disease, my reasoning abilities either go out the window or become the weapon that alcoholism uses against me. :: shrug ::
The only thing that I've found that helps is constantly talking to other alcoholics, daily reminders.
--Fenris.