Originally Posted by
Terminally Unique 
You are already wise to your Beast's ways, so don't play by your Beast's rules, which will exploit any feelings, good or bad, in order to get its fix. You have previously stated that you didn't want to make a Big Plan, which will make things more difficult. I've stated before that if there is no Big Plan, there is no AVRT, so I strongly recommend that you make one.
It's not so much that I
won't make a big plan, it's just that I can't. I honestly can't. There's honestly
nothing I think I could ever make a big plan about in my life and truly believe, and that's the god's honest truth. However
I still believe in AVRT in the sense that I believe it is very important for me to identify the addictive voice and separate that voice from myself. I hate to say this, but I
am different from most alcoholics in that I usually never have one single craving and then boom: I am drunk again after months and months of never even wanting a drink. Therefore, I have had to include my addictive voice/beast to not only be the mere thought to drink when I am feeling down (which has not happened yet), but all the angry and piteous thoughts that get me to the state where I even
allow that voice to creep in. That's how cunning my addictive voice is: it knows that initially if it tells me (like it did on Halloween) "If you were able to have a drink with the other parents, you'd get that nice warm fuzzy feeling", that I can and will easily shut that down because it is so obviously my addictive voice. So it tries to get to me instead by feeding me these thoughts which perpetually make me angry and pitying of myself. I know that sounds bizarre and like I am stretching it - but I know this to be true for myself and how my addictive voice has it's way with me.
I guess what I was really trying to figure out is if it is possible for the beast/addictive voice to work through dreams - or if these dreams I am having are real issues I need to work through (which I really do not want to do - I absolutely
abhor therapy). I am still on the fence.