Hi and welcome cuyootoo
i was happier when i was drinking and i don't really know how to be happy sober, and i don't even know even if i want to be sober.
I think this is common for everyone - if you rely on alcohol for as many things as I did - to pick me up, put me down, be happy, be entertained, feel safe, check out for a while - it's natural that losing the bottle is going to take some readjustment and the learning of quite a few new skills.
I don't know about anyone else, but it took more than just not drinking for me to be happy too - I'd drunk for a lot of underlying reasons, for years, and I needed to face and to deal with those reasons if I wanted to be sober - and happy with it.
It takes some time and effort but I'm glad I worked hard at it - I'm happy for the first time in my adult life
Have you considered getting a professional opinion about your depression from a Dr or a counsellor as well? that may help you to work out if there's something clinical going on...
rest assured, depression is definitely not brain damage - there's a lot we can do
D