Congrats on your time! I would second what many have said here: maybe now is not the right time for that trip?
I can't speak about drug addiction because I am an alcoholic, but I remember my first few months of sobriety were very tough. I went to AA meetings, but I essentially just sat there. I didn't do any recovery work. I didn't have a sponsor, hadn't started working the steps.
Things finally started changing when I started doing "the work".
Some people seem to be able to recover and feel better with a minimal amount of work. I think that is fantastic and I tip my hat to them!
I'm not one of those people.
I needed to do a maximum amount of work in order to recognize the nature of my emotional problems, what made me drink, and what I needed to do to change my entire outlook on myself and the world around me.
Have you considered some kind of program? There are alternatives to NA, such as a therapist, as laurie recommended.