I can relate to what you're saying, and I'll toss out my experience, which I think explains these reactions in myself.
My AF was forever shouting at me to DO {whatever it was} in a tone that suggested I OUGHT to have known. If he was working on a home project, for instance, he would never ask me to get the tools he would need, never explain what the tools were, never tell me where they were. At the instant he needed them, THAT is when he would shout as if I should have read his mind, as if I should have done it already, instead of waiting to be asked.
Keep in mind, we're talking even when I was probably as young as 8 and 9. And of course, it went on until I left home at 18.
I realized around the age of 16 or 17 what was happening, when I worked at my dad's company. He was forever accusing me of 'doing a half-assed job.' (Nice language to use with your daughter.) So I took the job I was given and I did it as thoroughly as it could humanly be done. Guess what. Then I was yelled at for dawdling and taking too long. Once again, I was supposed to read his mind, and know ahead of time, without being told, exactly how thoroughly THIS job was supposed to be done.
Even as an adult, if he came to my house to help, he'd treat me the same way, as if I ought to know beforehand exactly what he'd need, and be right there ready with it.
And sit down with a game...forget it. NOBODY sat in my house. In fact, I was very active in music in high school and went on to major in music in college and become a professional musician, but I hardly dared practice at home, because it wasn't considered 'work.' It was disregarded and viewed as screwing around. So I definitely feel even now that I can't sit and play a computer game (or whatever, just for fun).
So I can see myself reacting as you describe to someone vacuuming my house. But it would be because I grew up with constant criticism that I would believe this person, too, was viewing me critically and judgmentally.