Originally Posted by
AprilMay1895 
I feel like I'm dumb to even TRY getting sober during this time but also, I hate being alcohol dependent, I freaking hate it to pieces! I don't want to wait until things settle down in the spring.
On the contrary. The best time to try and quit is when things are at their "worst," because if you can hack that, when things are good you won't have any problem.
Originally Posted by
AprilMay1895 Second part of my monster winter is seasonal depression. I go into a "winter coma" in January and February and then start acting irrationally from March-April, not settling down until May. This was where I lost my 8 months of sobriety last year.
Some people do go on a low dose of anti-depressants temporarily in the winter for SAD. If this has happened to you before, perhaps that is something you might want to discuss with a psychiatrist.
Originally Posted by
AprilMay1895 I don't know what to do really; I guess I have to try to stay sober through what I can but if I do drink, I should just learn from it and try to stay sober again.
Careful there. It sounds like you are planning a little personal party under cover of a "learning" experience. Pure Addictive Voice.