I'm just feeling very disconnected right now...he's in a "all about me" phase and no matter what is going on ...it gets turned into HIS feelings, his wants and what is important to HIM.
I think that this is "normal" in recovery. And I think when you're two people in "parallel" recoveries, both parties need to be able to detach, take a step back, and each work on their own recovery.
If he is being a complete cling-on and demanding that you behave a certain way in order to facilitate his recovery, he's doing it wrong.
I also think that recovery by necessity means making that discovery, that
I have choices and I am able to competently decide what is best for me....
It can be a scary discovery, but it can also be very freeing. And whether he gets your freedom of choice or not is less important than that you do. You don't have to solve all the problems or make all the choices today. Big hugs.