Originally Posted by
NobleCause 
I have friends who try to bargain with me, promising to babysit me if I'll party with them, and obviously not understanding that the party doesn't just stop once they clock out. It's not an issue of them sabotaging my sobriety, it's an issue of them trying to be inclusive and knowing I can be a trainwreck when drinking without a handler, but not getting fully the totality of what it means to be alcoholic.
noblecause
:ghug3
totally get this.
I posted a few weeks back about a person who begged me to sip wine in a businessy-social situation. I think i was 10? 12? days sober at the time. fewer days than today (which is 40 days) (did people wander the desert this long carrying only matzoh? I digress...) I had only a few tools at the time but really started to notice how others react when I say I don't drink, or no. My friends or acquaintances think i'm "fun" but I did notice that once they got drunker, and i stayed sober, they started to annoy me. And that's my crapola. they weren't doing anything wrong. But it definitely showed me i have a long way to go before i feel comfortable in social situations. blech.
Incidentally, I also watched one woman nurse a beer for over an hour. How does she
DO that?!?!?! I have
no idea.
Anyway, I really get this. My last drunk, it's not something anybody else did. simultaneously, those who are not alcoholic do not understand what it means to feel or be alcoholic, because they aren't alcoholics while drunk or dry. they mean no harm when they encourage a drink. the challenge is with us to be "fit" - sometimes we falter but we keep trying and the only other people who get it are....other alcoholics.
My last drunk happened within a split second after I was determined to not drink at all. But when one person I like a lot walked by me and said, simply "Glass of wine?" I said yes and it took me to my knees. Pretty grateful for it, actually. Because now i'm here.
NC, you are such a wonderful writer.
welcome back.