Hey JWC, you sound a lot like me...welcome
. I'm 27, also a binge drinker...I would drink only occasionally (2-4 times per month), and for every 5 times I drank, 4 times I'd be able to control it. But, it got like playing Russian roulette with that ONE time I would get out of control. I could never predict it, but sometimes I would just get to "that point" where I would literally NOT be able to stop drinking until I blacked out. It wasn't fun.
You said, "it's like I won't accept the reality, that after a certain point, I have zero control over myself when I'm drunk." it actually sounds like you HAVE accepted that, and you're ready to change.
As far as social situations, just cut yourself some slack and don't worry too much about it until you feel more comfortable in your sobriety. It's pertfrctly acceptable to make up a lame excuse right now (antibiotics was my fav), or just tell your friends you had one too many hangovers and you're taking a break. It sounds like your friends are pretty cool and will support that. When your ready, you can open up more (to close friends) about how you don't intend to have alcohol in your life anymore. I was always worried that if I told everyone "HEY IM AN ALCOHOLIC AND IM QUITTING DRINKING!!!" it would make me more scared of failure than I already am!
So, hang in there and keep coming back here - you're in the right place.