Originally Posted by
JACKRUSSELLGIRL 
Anyone I know that has finally separated from their A's tells me the same thing. They always blame us for the split and tearing apart the family and get angry at us. They refuse to put the blame where it really belongs. ALCOHOL!!
He is acting out of anger because he blames you and in his little world of work/drink/denial it will always be you. You are the problem, not him. It is so tough when it effects the kids and trust me it effects them at any age. Mine are alot older and it still effects them. The only good thing is they know what is going on and they know all about this disease.
We are doing the right thing for our kids and someday this will all be behind us. All aboard that train exiting CRAZYTOWN!!
Keep posting and keep on keepin on!!
I don't think I even care anymore if AH ever recognizes his part in this split. After last night all I want (and I know I won't likely get it) is for AH to stop hurting the girls with his anger and resentment toward me (all for me expecting to be treated with respect-- yeah that's a good reason for resentment!).
Any man (or woman) who is so sick that they can't see (or see and refuse to acknowledge and address) that they are causing their kids to hurt bc of their behaviors is someone in deep deep trouble within themself and really has no business being a parent.
I think that I am going to have a lot more opportunity to practice the kind of conversations I had with D6 last night and I just hope that having one relatively sane parent will be enough to keep her from making the same bad choices I did.
My biggest fear is that if at age 6 she is already convinced that the solution to "fixing" things is to find a way to not make others angry, that this may already be ingrained in her psyche and I really hope it's not too late to help change that. She is a mini me in that regard and look where that thinking has gotten me! I don't want that for my D's and I hope I can help make up for the damage I've done by staying here far far longer than I should have.