Just wanted to thank you all for the kind support. Its strange, i have been away from other peoplefor so long it seems that i had almost forgotten that there are plenty of really good people out there. Every time i leave our house, my husband's family watches me, stops me, questions me, and tells me to go in and see my mother in law. So its been pretty much like living in a prison, which is why i wanted to move so badly. But thats a whole other ball o'wax.
When he came home, i confronted him about it, after he had promised that he hadnt been drinking, that he has stopped again, i went and got the evidence, and he stood there, pitifully looking like a scared child, and i thought, who is this? This is not the man i thought i married. Then he admitted that he has a problem, and said because of me arguing with his parents, and pushing the house issue, that the stess of it drove him to drinking. I retorted with,
this is so not my fault, you can not blame your problems on me, and he said, i am not blaming you, its just the situation that you caused has caused me to start drinking again. ...huh?
Then he said that he doesnt want a divorce, but thinks that life would be easier for both of us if i went back home to America with my boys and he stayed in Japan. So... he wont have to hide his drinking or porn or whatever anymore? So basicslly, he wants to stay married, but live a single's life without the stress of working together for our marriage, or raising the kids. Did i mention he is turning forty next year? Hah, i thought marrying someone older would mean that they had their act together.