TJP, I know how you're feeling.
But sometimes I think the under lying problem is that there is/was a problem within themselves that our loved ones are struggling with. Depression, shame, guilt, sadness, fear, self esteem, whatever . . . I know I wrestle with feelings of inadequacy but thankfully I do not have an addiction problem, or I am just able to control it right now . . . so many of our loved ones were/are just trying to self medicate to get them to "normal".