Originally Posted by
Cyranoak 
The one thing you must acknowledge and cannot indulge with denial or hope is that he is an alcoholic and he cannot stop drinking unless he can accept that and begin a program of recovery.
Until then, you'll just be getting what you've already gotten. Please, at the very least, be honest with yourself. I don't want to watch yet another woman come on this board, get great guidance and truth, then blow it all off and ruin her life further. It's getting old.
Cyranoak
Believe me...I've been lurking on this board and am not blowing off at the words of wisdom you all are sharing.
It is, however, tempting for me to "indulge with denial or hope" that he is not an alcoholic. I don't understand enough about what physiologically occurs in an alcoholic's body or mind. I really have a hard time understand how he can suddenly have a period of sobriety (for weeks or months) and be free of withdrawl symptoms - it makes me wonder if he's truly addicted? He claims he has only had a few beers all week. So then I wonder...does his ability to stop after 1 or 2 beers in a day (assuming he's telling the truth) mean that he's not really an alcoholic? Or does he have to drink those few beers to keep withdrawl symptoms at bay? How long does it take to build up a tolerance? Conversely, how long does it take for the tolerance to decrease during a period of alleged sobriety?
I'm not saying that I don't think he's an alcoholic....I'm just verbalizing the thoughts I have when I'm tempted to question myself and believe in him. My mind and heart feel like they are on opposite ends of a seasaw right now.