Welcome to SR Becky! Glad you found us. The 'magic' began for me when I decided to face all the unmagical and uncomfortable parts of my life, not numb them anymore with drugs/alcohol. Many ways to do this, AA and SMART are two ways, I use a mixture of a little bit of everything. Find a program that works for you, and work it. Thoughts and prayers are with you.
((((((((((Welcoming Hugs))))))))))))))