I just wish I could wash away all the years of hurt. It has not made me stronger because he was my best and only friend. You know how a bond like that can be. I can only hope that he sees me, knows how badly this hurts and forgives and we'll be friends again. I wish I could have made better choices in life, we all do. Life is a road with no easy drive. Right now, my "car" needs a lot of work to be solid. I'm sorry, I can't type anymore. Too upset.