Your thread brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry you are going through this. I don't care if it is early recovery, treating someone as if they don't exist is cruel.
It is ok to stand by someone but not at a cost to yourself or your lovely daughter. If he is going through this up and down thing and not sure what he wants maybe he needs the space to figure that out for himself.
Sounds like you are the easy scapegoat for really looking deep within himself. Or if he is, he is not happy with what is coming up for him so much easier to deflect that pain on the ones we care about the most.
Just take it moment by moment.