Wow...I just had a bit of an epiphany.
I was reading a post (AMANDA's) and she talked about taking it one day at a time. Don't worry about what tomorrow MIGHT bring...its going to bring it in whatever way it comes.
It suddenly occurred to me why I get so bent out of shape and start to obsess about what happens next. It's not so much that I want to control someone else's behavior and make them do what I think it best for them. It's that *I* don't want to end up in the position of having to confront my own weaknesses. I hate that I don't do a better job of protecting my boundaries and when the behaviors stay the same, I'm put in the position of holding to my word. Of causing myself pain. Of having to be firm.
UGH. Maybe I'm supposed to be here right now. This is the ultimate experience in learning to say and MEAN "No."