It kicked my butt too Sidney.
While I knew the overall change to sobriety was better for me.....I started to feel worse (insecure, depressed, sad, upset about my past, anxious, etc) early on in sobriety. I figured it was from all the punishments from the court system: house arrest, alcohol tethers, blowing every couple days, no license, trying to get to/from work, etc.
It did go away.....for several months....but it came back with a vengeance. In the meantime though, I was going to meetings (a couple per week - and no....I didn't like them much) and I finally started to comply with the court in that I found an out-patient substance abuse therapist and started to see her. Well, God works in mysterious ways because the therapist saved my bacon. She was/is in recovery herself and she was an immense help to me. She convinced me to give the steps a legit shot......and she helped me with a LOT of emotional baggage I'd carried around with me all my life.
I was pretty adamant about not taking some pill to treat the symptoms......I wanted to get to the root cause and get to work on THAT. Turns out, there was more than one root - lol. It also turned out that the process wasn't always fun. But I can tell you for sure, doing the work, getting grounded in AA and working the program, and a whoooole lot of prayers paid off. It wasn't the "quick fix" that I ordinarily would have chosen but it was a solution that's continued to work for me well into my recovery.....for several years now.
Like the AA book says, the drinking is just a symptom. Dealing with the crap that's deep down inside us can be intimidating, scary, and often seems like it's futile. It's a tough road to walk.......but it gets easier with practice and the payoff is WELL worth the effort.
There are many challenges to our sobriety......especially early on. Stay strong and look to see where you can step your game up a bit. Look for the area(s) where you might be slacking off or avoiding altogether and see if some additional attention to those things makes a difference.