I really like what Lexie said...separation brings clarity when living together is a chaotic confusing mind f**k.
One thing both me and the RAH have agreed on is how confusing it has been. Especially for him... as he takes this journey through recovery for the first time. He likes to tell me "I am all over the place" with my emotions. I just laugh, pat him on the arm and say "at least we have that in common!".
I didn't want to leave my husband. I had to leave to save myself and find my self respect. Had to. Not want to. And I had to step out of his life for him to be able to fully embrace AA and the 1st step. I had to remove myself from his chaos so he could see that chaos was created and maintained by him, not me. I had to separate to stop reacting to it all.
This decision you are making isn't about him as much as it is about you. Only you can take care of you. Do what is best for you, right now. Whatever that may be.