Hi, and welcome!
This is a VERY old thread, from 2004! Glad you are having some success in changing your communication--just don't expect it to have a huge impact on the alcoholic. You didn't CAUSE the drinking, you can't CONTROL it, and you can't CURE it. The changes we make are for us, not to help the alcoholic (who will do what he wants until he is ready to stop).
Why not post a nice intro thread so everyone can get to know you?
Glad to have you here!