At one point during couples counseling with my AW, she had told me that she was going to call me out any time I tried to control her or how she goes about her recovery. In response: that's fine, but just know that I will always tell you if I know you're lying. For me, lying destroys any chances of building trust with a person.
For my own recovery, it is important to be able to tell her when I believe she's lying. If she doesn't want to have that interaction, she can avoid me, but I'm not going to mislead her into thinking that she is fooling people.