Darklight,
I'd thought about al-anon. Your link prompted me to consider it further. There is a meeting tomorrow noon near me. I'll be attending. I could use some advice on where to draw boundaries. He's a neighbor. In this world, that has mostly ceased to mean much. But I wish it had not and have to act accordingly. He's not a close friend; he's not terribly important to me, though (I think) I've become important to him. But I may just be another mark in a history of his using the people available to him. Certainly the discussions I've had with his freind have made me suspect that that history exists. Am I just going to have to put on the armor? I think so. I DO care. I'm just worried that he's toxic. I really have enough issues of my own; I'm not interested in making a project out of him. I think that is what he wants so that he can prove he's unfixable. I hope to meet some people who can help me set appropriate boundaries so that I can be available to help w/o compromising myself.