Time4me,
I get where you are coming from. My ex/addict fiance went out and robbed a local bank a few weeks after I ended the relationship and asked him to leave our home. I saw his pic on the news as well. Tough pill to swallow, nothing surprises me anymore. He has been gone for 5 years now and will be coming back to town here in a few weeks. It has taken me 5 years and counting to get back to a sense of *good* in my soul & spirit. I pray that I never see him again. I felt what you are feeling, I know it hurts bad, but I swear if I knew then what I know now about the peace I feel and have in my life, I would have ended that relationship a long time ago.
Focus on you....are there any Al-Anon meetings that you can attend in your area?