headheldhigh

My AH hit bottom & started his recovery in Feb. He went to AA for a bit and was seeing a therapist. Our relationship slowly got better. I was hopeful & excited while it lasted. He's started to go back to his old self again, and I can't be sure if he is drinking. He stopped going to AA stating he couldn't relate to the god bit and felt it wasn't helping him. During this whole process some major character issues have come into light. Issues I guess I once attributed to his drinking, but now I just see them as irreconcilable differences.

I am really afraid that this is going to get ugly as soon as I hit him with the fact that I want out. We have 3 small kids and I am a stay at home mom. He is very irresponsible and I honestly do not trust him with the kids. Not only am I financially dependent on him, but I am scared about him getting any level of custody. He is very negligent - not feeding them, not changing diapers, putting them in harms way etc.

I need to prepare myself for the inevitable, including financial support & making sure he does not get the alone kids AT ALL. I know it's going to be harder on me, but honestly they are not safe with him. I have a son who has significant special needs, and my AH cannot care for him.

What should I be doing to put myself in the best situation to keep the kids safe and secure enough money so we are not hurting. He has a good paying job and we should be able to survive comfortably if it goes to our advantage.

I am just so scared and overwhelmed right now. I had hoped we could make it work and tried to deny the inevitable. But I'm finally accepting what is sure to be my future and need to be prepared to take care of my kiddos best I can.