I'm having a really hard time with things like this right now. DS has
never had to go to his father with empty hands on birthdays, Valentine's Day, Father's Day or Christmas. The urge to ignore Father's Day is so frickin' strong! It'd be the first year ever. Why bother since he has
never bothered for Mother's Day?.... I can't do that though... I want to, but no....
It's not that I want to get XAH a present (because believe me, he wouldn't appreciate what I'd like to throw at him these past few years), it was always so DS could be excited and happy about giving. It's usually little things like drawings, handmade bookmarks, fingerknit trinkets, etc.
It has always been DS's gorgeous eyes as he makes the surprise and then waits excitedly to be able to give it. He's the worst for keeping present secrets.
"Mom! Guess what I made you! No, wait! I won't tell you, but remember that beautiful yarn? Well, I made... No. It's a surprise! ... OK! Wait! Forget this tomorrow: I fingerknit a hairband for you! You'll like it! It's awesome! OK, forget I said now!"
XAH's response to the gifts has been to say "Oh, thanks, Buddy! I'll keep it forever" and then purposefully drop it as DS turns around to run to the car. GRRRRRRR. But, DS sees, even if he doesn't say anything to his father.
Yep, I understand this feeling.