Originally Posted by newstart75

When I read (or heard?0 somewhere recently that 'alcoholism is all about loneliness' (or words to that effect) I'm just starting to understand what that all means.
I live on my own and one thing I haven't been able to tolerate since getting sober 24 days ago is too much aloneness, quiet, or lack of activity!
And I'm not someone normally averse to enjoying my own company, I've even loved meditating for long periods in the past....but instead of drinking I have filled my days and weekends with 'stuff' - going places, going to AA, seeing friends, having visitors, visiting. But it extends to when I'm at home on my own too - it's like I'm afraid of being alone with my thoughts- have to have TV on in the background, I need the hum of the radio to get me off to sleep, I'm eating lots of sweets and drinking cups and cups of tea, I can't sit still for long. Consequently my home is pretty tidy, an upside for sure!
I know there's feelings that need to surface and maybe my busyness is a way of suppressing them - And when I do need to have a cry, or swear loudly, I do.
Any activity is better than drinking - and I'm starting to enjoy the fact that I can fill up my days with things that interest me, instead of nursing a hangover and feeling sorry for myself.
Keep up the sobriety!