Originally Posted by
shantra32 
My boyfriend's father is dying; he was diagnosed with Parkinson's at 38 and cancer 6 months ago. He is only 56 years old. He went to sleep three days ago and has barely woken since. The family has been told that he only has a couple of days left. And last night, I felt a WAVE of a craving.......I'm not afraid I will buckle because I always think things through now but it made me very uncomfortable. I didn't like it at all. I haven't craved much because things have been great. Since I have been sober,my health has improved, I have lost weight, my energy level is awesome, my depression and anxiety have diminished and I have even started working towards my goals of having my own business. But yesterday, I felt this horrible crushing feeling of "I need a drink."...I really didn't like that feeling at all. And I know some people here will say I'm writing because I think I will drink but that's not the case at all. I just feel the need to write sometimes when things get a little overwhelming. It's just sad is all.......I'm 139 days sober and thankful to be here. Thanks for listening
First, I am sorry to hear about your BF's father. I understand your need to get these feelings out. Terrible things happen in life, sober or drunk. It seems to me that it was just that much easier to ignore them when I was drinking...although it eventually made the situation worse. At least you can be of support to your BF at this time since your sober.
My only advice as to your situation is don't underestimate the power of those "cravings". With 139 days, you've probably got a good foundation, but be careful. Anytime that I have felt that I had this thing (alcoholism) under control, is when I've been the most vulnerable to jump back in it.