"Just having a few to relax" sounds familiar to me, too.
I also heard " I hate my living situation." "My job stresses me out."
Honey, make no mistake-healthy people do NOT need to take drugs or drink to "relax" or deal with stress! Drinking to deal with stress is maladaptive coping and a sure sign of alcoholism.
In fact, one of the biggest challenges for recovering alcoholics, is learning to deal with their stresses and resentments in healthier ways, rather than drinking. This is why AA works. It teaches a new way of living, above and beyond just NOT drinking.
Originally Posted by
Mightyqueen801 
The "I'm just having a few to relax" story just gave me cold chills. My ex-A husband used to say that one all the time.
Yes, it sounds to me as if your bf is an alcoholic. Think long and hard before marrying him and bringing children into that situation. I was the idiot (truly an idiot-actually lived with mine for six years and THEN married him!) telling myself that once we were married and had a child, OF COURSE he would magically change and grow up and life wouldn't be like this anymore.
Instead, he got worse after my daughter was born. He would go directly to the bar after work, and then come home around 11:30, 12-pack in hand, telling me, "I figured you would have the baby asleep by now and we can hang out." Is that what you're picturing when you imagine yourself married with a baby?