Originally Posted by
kittykitty 
Hi sandrawg,
I'm a big fan of the Godbox, or burning them like TC said. I like to do something tangible, makes me feel like I am doing something instead of just sitting there and taking it. I also have my sponsor from alanon read things. That way I feel better knowing that someone got to see it, even if it wasn't him.
I have a little gift-type box that I keep in my bedroom and I have put EXABF's name on a slip of paper and popped into my God-Box. Just the act of putting something on paper, putting it into the box is for me, a visual reminder of turning him (or whom or whatever) over to their HP.
Originally Posted by
kittykitty It's so hard to avoid the temptation of reading emails and listening to voice mails when you know you shouldn't. Even knowing that nothing good is going to come of it, I still find myself so curious that I have to see what is being said. Now, I think to myself, "whatever I find in this email, what am I going to do about it? Am I going to respond? (no- been no contact for a month now) Is it going to change anything? (no-it's all the same stuff he has told me time and time again, and never followed through on) Am I going to give him another chance? (no, absolutely not). Is it going to upset me, or steal my serenity? (YES, the answer is always yes.) So why bother looking at it?
90% of the time this works. Sometimes if I am having a bad day, I succumb to the pressure, the curiosity, and always end up regretting it. That's how he sucked me back in the first two times, caught me at a moment of weakness, and I read an email, and believed everything he said. I have to be stronger now, and I know you can be too!
kitty, I got sucked back into the web so many times after reading a pleading, begging, promising email and each and every time, I went back to the drama and chaos, thinking deep down that things would change. They never did. Like you, I have those weak moments, wondering if this time is "the time" that things will change. Judging from what I have seen, they haven't. It's not up for me to control whether they do change, only accept what is and move on and make the best for what I can control-me, my life and my decisions.
Originally Posted by
kittykitty Hope this helps in some way, keep writing those letters, I think it's healthy to get it all out that way. I know people have posted their letters on here before, and received validation and understanding about their feelings from others, which helps, especially because they knew that they wouldn't have received those things from the intended recipient. As you can tell, on this forum we love to read!
