Just an FYI, the email he sent me was from a couple of weeks ago. He got around my filter by using a hushmail account. He's done that multiple times when I'd blocked him before.
Of course, now I know it's him whenever I see "hushmail", so I know to ignore it.
When you say "Re-reading his helps me to see that anything I could say has already been said and would be used against me.
I have been thrown under the bus too many times, had my own words used against me and this time, I was determined not to respond"
OMG! That is so characteristic of MY ex. He should come with a disclaimer "anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of debate with an alcoholic"...
Of course, I used his words against him, as well. I made a point of going through old IMs or emails to show where he contradicted himself (ie., LIED). lol
I gotta try to forget about that last email. It was a weird rambling one, anyway. He kept referring to himself as "your 23-yr-old boyfriend" (even tho he's my 27-yr-old EX boyfriend)...he brought in some stuff about his grandparents picking out burial plots (??? wtf, was this to get sympathy?)...he said "I can't be with you at this point in my life, it's too painful and too psychotic" (as if I would be with him anytime in the future) and at the end, leaves off with "figure out where this "I'll Make Him Pay" cr*p comes from and then, MAYBE"
And that's how it ends.
LOL! Maybe WHAT? Maybe you'll get back with me? And maybe pigs will fly out my b*tt!!!
In the same email he says he hated the way I made him feel (yeah, I hated the way he made me feel, too, when he was drinking. So we're even), insulted my career and lifestyle choice, and denied that he walked away from me over drinking. (Funny, I seem to remember in mid-March, he was begging me, asking what I wanted him to do to stay with him. I said STOP DRINKING. He walked. And less than a month after that, I find out he's hooking up with his ex. Oh, but he flatly denies walking away from me to rush into something with her. He's so delusional.)
Ok, now that I got all that out to you guys, I feel better. lol
THANKS!
Originally Posted by
Linkmeister 
sandra-I'm like you, I can be argumentative and always want the last word. It's been hard for me to walk away but I have been working really hard and it has helped my serenity level a lot.
This time, I took the high road and did not respond to any of my EX's pleading, begging, angry emails. I use Outlook and set up rules for these emails to go into a folder where I can see that yes, I got an email from him, yes, I can read it, but no, I don't have to respond. Re-reading his helps me to see that anything I could say has already been said and would be used against me.
I have been thrown under the bus too many times, had my own words used against me and this time, I was determined not to respond. It does not mean that I haven't wanted to respond; I would compose emails and then save them in another folder - in fact, I went back and read some of his earlier ones to me, some of mine in response and realize that the only thing that changed was the date in which they were sent. This time, I didn't respond and it felt good. I didn't get back on the merry-go-round and say the same words over and over again, only to have them thrown back in my face.
The EX revived his Facebook page and yes, I looked (we're not friends) and judging from what I see, he is still up to the same old tricks. He's registered on dating sites (2weeks after we split up) and the line of BS he has on there is unbelievable. But, when I see that, it tells me that nothing will ever change with him.
I am moving forward and while I won't deny that there's hurt and anger to process through, I can come to SR, go to an Al-Anon meeting, read through their literature or Melody Beattie's books for comfort, inspiration and hope.