Originally Posted by
Babyblue 
My best friend just said the same thing to me about the RABF.
That is the part I get stuck on though: He may not be doing it TO ME or because of me but if that is the case, why am I the one feeling badly?
Not highjacking the thread, I get caught up in the things that make no sense and can't let them go easily as well.
Practice practice practice!
It's because we tend to make THEIR behavior about US. I know being in a relationship with someone puts us in a position to take it personally, but with an alcoholic, it really isn't. He's just doing it (whatever it is). It's not about you, heck I doubt they even think about us when they do hurtful stuff. They just do what they do. I don't think hurting me ever crossed my AH's mind. He was oblivious to everyone but himself.
L