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Originally Posted by
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So I just talked to xabf. He attended his first as meeting tonight. He texted me a little after 7 to say that he was glad he went and it was good. I replied that I was glad and he could call me if he wanted to later.
He called an hour later, I could hear it in his voice, he has had several beers. I know, even over the Phone. I didn't accuse. He brought it up by baiting me with "I can't believe I am getting accused of DRINKING tonight.
" and what bs it was that his dad accused him.
Still Played dumb but listened to his quacking about how beneficial the meeting was until I was really sure, then stated simply that I needed to go get dd in bed.
Really?
That bold part belongs in "things normies don't know/do". I too can tell, over the phone when AH is drinking. In fact, I can tell based on what he used to say he was leaving to do whether he was going to drink. A's I guess think that we are idiots or they are just so consumed with their "fix" that they don't care how obvious they are... Sorry you had to deal with this. I'd turn the phone off for good when he leaves the house from now on. That way you are guaranteed peace.
I guess there is a possibility that he lied and did not go to the meeting. Or maybe he went, and started drinking after the meeting. Has your a drank immediately after meetings?
My H and I were returning from outpatient rehab family night a few months ago (for him) and 2 of the guys from his program- who were there bc of a court mandate- were at the gas station we stopped at bc the car was running on fumes. They asked AH if he wanted anything and then went into the store and got a case of beer each. In broad daylight. They could've been busted and gone back to jail and had just left a 3 hr rehab/AA type meeting... And I think that AH was upset that I was there and he couldn't join them.
So, yes, people drink before, after and if they could get away with it, during meetings. My H hasn't done it in front of me but like you I've known when he has bc of the texts I get, the calls or the way he leaves the house claiming he is going to a meeting and then stumbles home 5 hrs later...
I think turning off your phone and continuing as best you can to not respond to him when he baits you is your best bet...