It has really helped me reading all these posts. I have so many issues w/my family. My mom passed away on 6/6/09 and since her death my sister and brother are barely speaking to me. So what others have tried to make me understand is, I am not responsible for how people think and act, or whatever stories they make up in their head over situations. If they start talking out of the side of their neck as I like to put it, the responsibility is on me if time after time I keep allowing it, because when I do its just giving them the message that it is okay to keep doing it. Way easier said than done.
I can't tell you how many hours I spend trying to figure out what they are thinking because like your son they don't have the tools to communicate in a healthy manner.
I get sick of being the one who continually reaches out by calling, or sending e mails, and for the most part I get no response back.
The sick part of this whole thing is I have no clue what the problem is, I think I may know? I was the one that was with my dad when he gave my moms stuff away to the shelters and I think they think I ended up getting all this stuff?
Greed is not an attractive quality and I am getting ready to go home for a visit in June for my b-day and my moms 2nd anniv Mass.
It is so hard for me to be a grown up because I really don't want to go be around any of them, except my dad, and my other brother & his family.
When I go home they turn on this fake facade of how much they miss me & love me but yet they can't call or write.
I am sorry for venting all of this on your post but reading yours sparked all this emotion.
All we can do is pray and stay true to ourselves no matter how hard it is.
Peace & Blessings
