I know I got very caught up in trying to get my daughter to understand things..didn't want to drive her further down...until I realized that being the sane one was the best way to love her.By saying..NO..I will not watch while you put your children in danger, you are being a healthy role model..if/when she sobers up she will not thank you for enabling her to have those kids while using..she will wonder why everyone else looked the other way and failed to protect...the way I say it to myself is "She' using/drunk/impaired of judgement...what's MY excuse?"