Bad night need to get off my chest
Well I'm having a bad night & went to a 7:30 meeting and no one else there. UGH!!! I have been sober since July 9 with 3 one-day relapses the last one being last Sunday. This time it is so hard! I'm disappointed in the relapses but not convinced it won't happen again so I feel very stuck. I've been thinking "maybe I should have one more last drunk?" Lots of people at meetings say them remember their last drunk. I don't know if I do (from original sobriety in July). I know I was in a deep daily habit of drinking but it was such the norm of life for me then, it wasn't exactly "the last drunk." I am confusing even myself these days. Life just seems hard lately. Very hard and I'm only 31 and worry that a life in recovery is going to be such a constant struggle.