Triggers are tough to deal with because they hit you out of the blue, when you least expect it, kind of like the alcoholic behaviour we have all had to endure. To my dying day, the sound of a soda/beer can opening makes me go cold as I knew that once one opened, many more would be opened before all was said and done.
SJ - I had one of those days like you had a couple of days ago-had some MAJOR yard maintenance done - we're talking chainsaws to cut down trees, gas powered weed eaters...my dog was so stressed out over the noise and change in his routine, a neighbour, while admiring what was being done, kind of sneered at "how much this would cost" (I didn't tell her)......all the while I'm trying to finish an Accounting assignment.
In the midst of all of this, I get an email from the ex, making really snide comments, (once again), blaming things on me. Yeah, it brought up a whole bunch of bad stuff and yeah, it hurt more than I thought it would. It got deleted ASAP. Somehow, it gets through my security, but maybe it's a good thing as I see it's the same old same old coming from him. Makes me see that my decision to leave was right for me.
The way I looked at it was that it was only a day, 24 hours, and it would soon be over. I could get through it, I would get through it. I wasn't going to let his words still hold power over me.
Walked the dog, did some shopping, came back and realized that in spite of the email and all of the stuff going on at my place, I had so much to be grateful for - the house, my dog, my family and friends - people who genuinely love me, who don't blame me for their lot in life and who accept me for me.
And yes, I do believe the full moon does affect all of us in many ways.....
Hugs coming your way for a better day......
